I am ____________.

...not who I want to be. ...not a good single mom.
...addicted to TV and snacks....not sure why this Christian living thing is so hard....a hypocrit....tired...not sure how to get unstuck....braindead.
...whining....always sure I will be better next week.


On the outside, things look normal. But my spirit has been so weighed down as of late. My mind is constantly swimming with all that I should do but yet I find my butt glued to the couch at night and my eyes staring at the TV while my Bible sits on the hutch behind me and the laundty sits beside the couch. I go to sleep sure that I can resist the sweets, that I will work out, that I will get out of bed early for quiet time, that I will do housework a little at a time, that I will be a better mom tomorrow.

I guess I am in good company. Paul too struggled with doing what he knew was right. He too knew that he needed God's command. I am allowing my sin, my enemy, to defeat me. But, my God is a deliverer, a protector, a merciful Father. He will carry out His good work in me, eventually.

For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Romans 7:18-19

Lesson's Learned from a Four Year Old

When trouble comes and it seems that your world is ending, call out for your Father.

It is always the best idea to be safe.

It doesn't matter if we mess up the words to the song, sometimes more truth comes out that way.

Putting things in straight lines or making a collection can be hours of fun.

Daddy's are silly, so they can't ride the bus for field trips. Only Mommy's get to ride the bus.

Nothing fixes a boo-boo like a little kiss.

If you don't get what you want the first time, just keep asking, who knows maybe somebody will change their mind.

Interviewing

When I was growing up I wanted to travel the world and interview interesting people. I wanted to tell their stories. I wanted others to learn from the wisdom, stupidity, mistakes, and words of others. Well, this is what I ended up with.

For you, Sara and Josiah...

Blue eyes hold a special place in my heart (my man and my baby both have baby blues). But two of my very favorite people have blue eyes too. One has been my life long friend and one squirmed his way into my heart five years ago. On October 7, they share a birthday. I love you Sara. I praise God everyday that I ended up your little sister. You played a huge part in who I am becoming. Josiah, you are the most amazing little boy. I knew from the moment I held you that you were amazing. God has such fantastic plans for you.

Goals for the Week

This week marks the beginning of Chris' travel season. I tend to let things slide when he is out of town. The last time he was gone I downed a half gallon of chocolate peanut butter ice cream. ouch! So to curb the inevitable downturn in my physical (ice cream is bogo this week too), spiritual, and mental health I am setting some goals for the week and counting on some accountability from my friends.

Goal 1: Dessert only three times this week. Tuesday at small group, Thursday for Special K bars at school, and Saturday for a possible birthday shindig.

Goal 2: In bed by 9:15 so I can get up at 5:30 to spend time with my Father

Goal 3: Work out 4 times

Goal 4: Love my kids, both in school and at home, even when they drive me up the wall.

They can't help it, they're kids.

Goal 5: Not complain about single parenting. I have friends who single parent every day, at least I am blessed enough to have a husband who will come home eventually.